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Speak her language and become conversant in her sexual meaning system, but also be able to express your desire, and especially your gratitude, for what you get from sex. He may be unable to grant himself permission to cross that threshold. You can kiss a girl and like it and be straight, but man on man sex is quickly put in the category of homosexuality.
After that, the secret to keeping sex passionate and fresh is in the meaning, connection, and cooperative creativity of sexual pleasure. Just do it and see what develops.
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